The Fifth Day of Twelve Days of Christmas
I'm continuing my series on The Twelve Days of Christmas. As I shared previously, Brian McLaren pushed me to ponder how I might put the Twelve Days of Christmas into action.
I laid awake last night pondering five rings that we often wear: friends and family, community, self identity, faith, and presence. The substance of our lives is made up of these rings, the circles of humanity, that surround us.
The ring of friendship and family is fraught with trial and error, especially while young. We move from, "Who likes what I do?" to "Who believes what I do?" The journey is not without agony, where one truly loves, yet friendship and family help us survive, even thrive. CS Lewis reminds us, “Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art.... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.”
And Lewis on the cost of love, lest we forget:
To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.
― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
I'm not an expert on the subject of love, but I do know that love is most often an act one lives out. It's rarely a 24 hours a day feeling, past the first blush of a crush. There are moments the heart swells each day, moments the heart smiles and is warmed, but much of our lives is built on living out the act of love, creating a love that lasts. Where do I need to practice love today?
The ring of community is what keeps me living outside of myself and giving something back. While children, we are hopefully nurtured in community, but by the time we reach young adolescence we ought to be giving back in community. Community sustains us, as we sustain it. Community is forward thinking. It may need to address the past, but the best communities are daily planning for future generations. They are preparing to give back, while they yet live the present day. Where do you and I need to invest in our communities in a way that only we can invest?
The ring of self identity or peace with self is one of relinquishment. I will not always be who I hope to be. I will let go of expectations that are unrealistic. I will learn to love myself by actively putting myself out there in the world and living the gifts I have been given. I will take the time to figure out what gifts I have to give. I will be brave enough to ask others around me, "what are my strengths and what are my weaknesses?" I will recognize that I can never truly love others deeply and wholly until I love myself. I will get up every day and work on this journey.
The ring of faith reminds me that I need hope coursing through my veins and the world doesn't revolve around me. It recognizes that even if I cannot see the other side of the rainbow, it is there. It attests that while I cannot see the wind, I know it exists because I see how it blows the world around me. It humbly believes that while science may solve amazing mysteries, as it opens up new ones, I will not decide mankind is God. There are simply things I do not know. This is the beginnings of faith - relinquishing faith in one's self and one's limited knowledge. Admit need. Admitting you and I don't know it all. In this place, God's spirit has opportunity to abide.
Finally, the ring of presence makes all the other rings possible. All real giving is given in relationship that honors the One True Giver and the recipient. Presence requires the gift of time, the relinquishment of one's own agenda for the day. Time. time. Presence keeps us awake at night with prayers for the one who is struggling. Presence means we go out of our way to do what is uncomfortable, when it's most uncomfortable, with no guarantee that the investment will at some point turn "comfortable." Presence means there's no guarantee we'll ever get anything from the situation, but we give anyway.
Presence is not giving the repeated gift of being walked upon. Presence doesn't mean one must be subject to slander of one's self or others. Presence has boundaries, healthy ones, that recognize that your gift may be a one time investment, a pointer along their path and yours, that to give is better than to receive. Yet, presence listens to the still small voice of the Giver and knows when it's time to pull back and put one's energy elsewhere. Giving a gift is sometimes painful, and receiving a gift can even be painful, but God never intends for the gifts He bestows upon us to beat us down or berate us. God first came as love. We attempt to move from within the love of God, the Spirit of Love. But we remember, God doesn't knock down doors and force His presence and His time where it's not welcome. God shows up to those who open the door.
Let us this year wear the rings that matter most upon our fingers and interlaced upon our hearts: the rings of friends and family, community, knowing self, faith, and presence. When December of 2015 comes round, we'll have given and received gifts that matter. We'll be adorned with golden rings that cannot easily be taken away, and who's value doesn't diminish.
I laid awake last night pondering five rings that we often wear: friends and family, community, self identity, faith, and presence. The substance of our lives is made up of these rings, the circles of humanity, that surround us.
The ring of friendship and family is fraught with trial and error, especially while young. We move from, "Who likes what I do?" to "Who believes what I do?" The journey is not without agony, where one truly loves, yet friendship and family help us survive, even thrive. CS Lewis reminds us, “Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art.... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.”
And Lewis on the cost of love, lest we forget:
To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.
― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
I'm not an expert on the subject of love, but I do know that love is most often an act one lives out. It's rarely a 24 hours a day feeling, past the first blush of a crush. There are moments the heart swells each day, moments the heart smiles and is warmed, but much of our lives is built on living out the act of love, creating a love that lasts. Where do I need to practice love today?
The ring of community is what keeps me living outside of myself and giving something back. While children, we are hopefully nurtured in community, but by the time we reach young adolescence we ought to be giving back in community. Community sustains us, as we sustain it. Community is forward thinking. It may need to address the past, but the best communities are daily planning for future generations. They are preparing to give back, while they yet live the present day. Where do you and I need to invest in our communities in a way that only we can invest?
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| A Survival Birthday. Let us do more than survive community! |
The ring of faith reminds me that I need hope coursing through my veins and the world doesn't revolve around me. It recognizes that even if I cannot see the other side of the rainbow, it is there. It attests that while I cannot see the wind, I know it exists because I see how it blows the world around me. It humbly believes that while science may solve amazing mysteries, as it opens up new ones, I will not decide mankind is God. There are simply things I do not know. This is the beginnings of faith - relinquishing faith in one's self and one's limited knowledge. Admit need. Admitting you and I don't know it all. In this place, God's spirit has opportunity to abide.
Let us remember that God inhabits the praises of His people. My heart cry this year has been and will continue to be, "More of your Spirit Lord in our home and hearts. Increase our faith in You." Certainly, we will reach children in the way that is best for them, if His Spirit is within us. How can we care for the least of these, unless we have God's heart with which to care?
Finally, the ring of presence makes all the other rings possible. All real giving is given in relationship that honors the One True Giver and the recipient. Presence requires the gift of time, the relinquishment of one's own agenda for the day. Time. time. Presence keeps us awake at night with prayers for the one who is struggling. Presence means we go out of our way to do what is uncomfortable, when it's most uncomfortable, with no guarantee that the investment will at some point turn "comfortable." Presence means there's no guarantee we'll ever get anything from the situation, but we give anyway.
Let us this year wear the rings that matter most upon our fingers and interlaced upon our hearts: the rings of friends and family, community, knowing self, faith, and presence. When December of 2015 comes round, we'll have given and received gifts that matter. We'll be adorned with golden rings that cannot easily be taken away, and who's value doesn't diminish.
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